Permenant Decisions

We live in a day of increasing pressures to have, do, and be more than previous generations. Women are constantly under the pressure to have the perfect body, be every woman, and do it all in a perfect way. Men are told they must conquer the world in every respect. I completely understand the pressures that people face in the heat of day to daycircumstances. The frustration that builds up within a person can often be more than we think we can bear.

This fire heats the kitchen, and the magic cal...

This fire heats the kitchen, and the magic caldron heats the hot water and two radiators : Ce feu chauffe la cuisine et le chaudron chauffe l'eau et deux radiateurs à l'étage (Photo credit: hardworkinghippy)

These day to day expectations that are placed upon us can be the source of desires to do things that under reasonable and ideal circumstances, we would never consider. Yet, the notion of making a permanent decision in the heat of a moment based on a temporary situation is both dangerous and impractical. People have destroyed their finances, their families, their futures and even their own lives by making hasty and permanent decisions in the heat of an often temporary situation.

Permanent Decisions:

 

  • Eliminate Options:The haste to make a permanent decision eliminates the potential options of other, more reasonable and suitable decisions.
    • Rob Others: You cheat others out of experiences that could have been shared with you. You are never in things alone. If you don’t give them the benefit of supporting you and giving you new perspectives that on your own would consider. Realize that other people’s experiences are there for you to draw from for a wealth of wisdom in how to handle situations. The bible tells us that safety is to be found in the multitude of of counsel.
    • Rob You: Many times you will rob your own self of choices and opportunities by making swift decisions. It’s an awful thing to cheat others. It’s an even greater thing to realize that you have cheated yourself. The potential for victories and joys are often wrapped up in the decisions that are many times not found in the hasty decisions, but the harder ones.
  • Stunt Growth: Character is built and you matured often by the not so easy decisions that are available to you. Who could you be if you actually went with the tougher, and often less desirable decision? Would we even know Rosa Parks if she had not sat down on that bus that one hot day?
  • Are Filled with Regrets: If you make a permanent decision that doesn’t end your own life, it will commonly fill you with regrets.

When I first arrived in Atlanta, I had the pleasure of interviewing the Dean of the university I first attended. While his words were not foreign to me, they struck a certain chord within me, that I always knew would stay with me and be a guiding factor in how I make decisions. He told me, “The most ethical and right decisions are seldom the easiest to make, but are often the best.”

Great Decisions are Born Through:

  • Courage: Often we make decisions based on what is comfortable to us in the moment, as opposed to what will take courage to deal with. The courage it takes to do the thing that isn’t comfortable often stretches us in ways we can never fathom.
  • Time : Time often allows us the opportunity for perspective. When we give ourselves time, we often see things that we would have missed. In the game of chess, this is often a truth that many miss.
  • Transparency: This is one area that I am still learning to grow in. Being open enough to share with someone that you are facing something that you fear is great, you will discover that they will see your strength in your daring to be vulnerable and transparent.
  • Yielding: We typically feel out of control if the decisions we make aren’t originated by us. Yielding to a decision that is born of a higher standard or “the road less traveled” bears the greatest fruit.

QUESTION: Have you or someone close to you ever made a permanent decision in the heat of temporary situation? How has it impacted your life?

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