Recently I went on Facebook and came across a video that really spoke volumes to me. It was one of those rare occasions where you observe someone who gets “it.” Whether you’re married or planning to get married, there are just some things that you cannot control. One of the lessons that I learned well before my wife and I married was that I had to be willing to accept her as she was; lock, stock, and barrel.
So often I see people who date or marry someone with the hopes and dreams of changing them, making them, or molding them into the ideal that is in their head as what they truly want. The problem with that is you wind up only frustrating yourself, and often them. In reality, the only person you can ever truly change is yourself.
The only person who can change the person you’re with or are in a relationship with is the one who created them. What’s more, the change that a person makes, may still not be what you’d consider as what you consider as what you wanted out of them. However, when God is the tie that binds your relationship, what you find in a person that either causes you pain or is less desirable, God is more than able to bring about the necessary changes, as you commit yourself to Him in prayer.
How often do we overlook the power of prayer in making the difference in a relational situation? God is not one who will sit idly by as His elect languish in sorrow over things that are never yours to handle. When God brings two people together, things that bring trials and heartache to you are things that concern Him as much, if not more. Scripture says that we are to, “casting all your care on Him, because He cares about you.” He will not ignore your petitions.
However, what many do not realize is that often, in the process of changing them, He changes you. God has a sense of humor in that respect. I know that this is the case for so many whom I come into contact with.
When you hit a brick wall in your relationship, you have to be mindful that situation you’re facing is not always a natural one. Even, those that are may be rooted in something that goes deeper than what can be dealt with naturally. Take up the challenge of putting him/her on the altar of prayer. While this is not an over night solution, your commitment begins with the simple action of giving it over to the One who has the power to make things happen.
QUESTION: Do you trust God enough to change your mate? What if the change you seek winds up changing you instead?