A popular musical group that has taken the world by leaps and bounds is a group that has become known as the Beatles of this generation, One Direction. What has often amazed me about this group, or any group for that matter in music are those that have such diverse personalities. It always amazes me as to how they stay together as long as they do. The reality is, that for many of them, one member always stands out and in time the group either disbands, or begins to not be what it once was when it began. This can often be what marriage is like for couples who don’t go into the marriage having a focused or established direction to take it.
One of the things that I always stress with people when I talk to them about marriage, whether they’re already married or dating and considering marriage, is the need for both people to be on the same page or going in the same direction. You’ll probably notice that one of the scriptures that gets used in relationship to marriage is 2 Corinthians 6:14 which, by the way is not specifically talking about marriage, but fits because it is talking about partnership which marriage is often like.
When it comes to businesses, especially those that are partnerships, what typically happens is that two people come together and each person in it says “I have a-b-c strengths, you have x-y-z strengths, why don’t we work together to create something that I might not be able to sufficiently on my own.” Once the two come together, they create a vision statement, and sometimes a mission statement to say how they will fulfill the vision statement.
It is in the vision statement where trouble often comes, both in business and marriage. What Paul attempts to point out to the Corinthians in 2 Corinthians 6:14 is that it is frustrating to try to have two people who have opposing visions, or are not in agreement. He uses the picturesque image of oxen when he uses the phrase yoke together, because the idea is that when oxen are yoked together, they are typically of equal size, strength and facing the same direction so that they might effectively pull the plow in a straight line down the field. If the oxen were of unequal size, strength, or facing opposing directions this would result in chaos at most, or at the very least a line that veers way of tract from where the farmer would desire for them to go.
In marriage, having two people with different views of that marriage, what its purpose or goals are, or where it is headed is simply a recipe for disaster. The marriage that stands longest are those where the two in it are agreed on what exactly that marriage is, and why they are together. One thing that some couples fail to realize, just as some individuals do, is that the vision can change over time, and therefore needs to be reviewed often as the relationship develops. Who we are or become is not always the person we once were when we first met. So, it is a good thing to on occasion come together so that you’re constantly making course corrections, just as a captain would “right the ship”. Your marriage or Relation-Ship should undergo direction correction periodically so that you wind up at your intended destination, or else find your relation-ship wrecked.
QUESTION: How do you ensure that your relationship is going in the right direction.
- The Right Person (thebookoflife.org)